


Fingers Entwined

by SouthernCross



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, F/M, Fluff, Meet-Cute, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:15:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22133911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SouthernCross/pseuds/SouthernCross
Summary: Darcy finds herself distracted by the hot guy working at the library.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Darcy Lewis
Comments: 26
Kudos: 190





	Fingers Entwined

Today the concentration was not coming. Darcy looked down at the books and notes spread out before her and the laptop opened to her right and just couldn’t find the will to read one more sentence. It didn’t help that there was a tall, dark haired distraction taking up most of her brain cells.

Sneaking a glance, Darcy watched said dark haired man putting away the books, every few titles he would reach up and she would be treated to a very nice look at his ass. She hated herself for the objectifying, but he was just so damn pretty. Pretty was an understatement, he was gorgeous, and she had always been a sucker for blue eyes. Add in the jaw line, dimple, and resting bitch face and she was a goner. 

Finding him at the library of all places had been unexpected, she had taken to spending early mornings at the local library, the libraries on campus were filled with too much debt and desperation. Darcy liked the old building with its renovated kids corner and framed quotes from Harry Potter and the Hunger Games. She wondered if he had read the Hunger Games, he looked like the type to enjoy a spot of violence. He definitely would have thrived in the Games, with that physique and the wary eyes, it was clear he had seen some sort of action, even if the prosthetic arm hadn’t given it away.

Darcy didn’t think she had ever loved anyone enough to volunteer as tribute, but she would have done everything she could to get out of the arena alive. Maybe not against the hot librarian but she could have held her own against Foxface and Peeta. Oh yeah she would have dropped bread boy without a second thought. Snorting she dropped her gaze when she felt eyes turn her way at the noise.

Focusing on her notes, finals were too damn close for her liking she tried to focus on the political and socio economic landscape of post war Vietnam. Failing she stood and stretched, she had been sitting for almost two hours. Eyes wandering, she didn’t see him, but the young adult section called to her.

Pulling Hunger Games from the shelf, she smiled to herself as she flipped open to a random page, she definitely would have kicked some ass. Well at least she would have tried, she took Krav Maga twice a week, had gone at first because of one too many sets of wandering hands in public settings, and stayed because she liked it. Loved it actually, loved understanding and depending on her body in a way she had never done so before.

So maybe she would have put up a little bit of a challenge.

‘That’s a good one,’ Darcy snapped the book shut reflexively, looking up she was surprised to see hot library guy in front of her.

She swallowed, ‘Uh, yeah it’s one of my favorites.’ Uh, really she started with uh, wonderful, way to sound like the cultured academic she was paying a lot of money to become.

The smile he gave her was small, but hot damn he was good looking, like she didn’t want to focus on just his face, she prided herself on being attracted to all types of people, but he was hot on another level.

‘Mine too.’ That surprised her.

‘I’d like to think I’d do alright in the arena,’ she flipped her hair over her shoulder, and gave him a wide smile. He glanced down at his hands, she noticed not for the first time that his left hand was a prosthetic. The mechanics were black and inlaid with gold, unlike anything she had ever seen before, and pretty awesome looking.

‘I might have lasted a day or two,’ she snorted at his modesty. His eyebrows rose at the noise, she heard the silent,  _ what _ . She waved at  _ all _ of him, ‘I’m guessing those muscles aren’t just for show.’

The words had blurted out before she could really think about what she was saying, stupid, broken filter. 

She needed to salvage this, ‘Muscles aren’t everything though, I mean there are the sponsors and I would have killed with those superficial Capitol assholes.’

His laugh wasn’t loud but it warmed her.

Not at all how she had thought her day would go, but when he introduced himself as James, and extended his hand, she had taken it and smiled.

‘Darcy.’

Introductions had led to a walk through the Fiction section, he pointed out what he liked, she pointed out what she disliked.

‘So that was fun,’ James was not as outgoing as she thought he might be, true he worked in a library, which screamed introvert, but in her experience people with his level of hot were much more outgoing.

Introvert or Extrovert, he took the bait, ‘It was,’ she tried and failed when his tongue swept out and across his bottom lip, Jesus Mary and Joseph, that should be illegal. ‘Would you like to talk some more, maybe over coffee.’

Yes, please and thank you to whoever was out there or up there and had put this moment together for her.

‘I love coffee, like I can drink it all the time, and yes, yes I would like to have some, now, or later, or whenever, with you.’

God. Damn. It.

James only blinked, ‘Ok, I’m done here in half an hour if that works.’

‘Yes, sure, I’ll meet you out front in 30.’ 

He smiled at her, his eyes lighting up, and she knew she was screwed.

Making some last minute notes on the paper she had been working on, it wasn’t due until next week, but she was trying to be less of a procrastinator, she packed up her laptop and returned her books to the stacks. 

Stopping in the bathroom she touched up her lipstick and tied her hair up into a high ponytail. The dark blue jeans fit nice and her white shirt contrast nicely with the dark yellow cardigan she was wearing. Maybe not what she would have chosen for a first date, not that this was a first date, but she looked cute, bordering on hot. She could work with that.

It was just coffee and a conversation, it didn’t have to be more, it might not be anything other than a nice conversation with a nice guy. Either way she was not going to overthink things and let herself go off without a filter.

* * *

Darcy was sitting on the steps outside of the library idling scrolling through Instagram, liking the posts that caught her eye, when a long shadow fell across her. Looking up she smiled at James who was looking down at her.

‘Hi,’ she took the hand he stretched out to her, a gentleman she thought and fought a blush.

‘Hi.’ He was a lot taller than her, taller than she had noticed before, she had to tilt her head up to look at him properly. 

They made small talk on the walk to the coffee shop, he was 32, honorably discharged from the Army. ‘Lost my arm at the shoulder’ She didn’t press for details but she did wonder at what he had gone through.

He ordered a caramel macchiato, she teased him about having a sweet tooth, even though she ordered a vanilla latte. ‘Yeah I guess I do.’ There was that smile again and another appearance by his tongue and Darcy really wanted climb him like a tree. Not that she had done that as a kid or really as an adult. The guys she tended to go for were more along the long and lanky academic type. The girls she ended up with were soft and supple.

Honestly the way the denim of his jeans were hugging his thighs were giving her ideas, all the ideas.

They sat at a table near the windows, the late afternoon sky was a startling gray.

‘I think it’s going to snow tonight,’ she took a sip of her drink as she considered his words.

‘Yeah, it looks that way. I like the snow in theory, definitely better than a heat wave, but it’s a pain in the ass.’

Conversation flowed easily, as it had before, she was glad for it, and even more grateful that she didn’t let her nerves take over. Darcy was surprisingly not nervous, James wasn’t a chatterbox, he chose his words carefully, but he was focused on her, on what she said and that was as startling as it was flattering.

He hadn’t even checked his phone once since he had sat down.

‘Social media really isn’t my thing. Sam calls me a dinosaur.’ James had told her how he had enlisted out of high school with his childhood friend Steve, how they had both planned to make a career out of the service. The plan had worked out for Steve, he was a Captain, stationed overseas, ‘London, he met someone, Peggy, she’s great, a local.’

When James had gotten injured, gotten his papers, Steve had reached out to Sam, asked him to check in, he worked full time at the VA. ‘You guys are friends now?’ She almost laughed at the face he had made. ‘I guess,’ James shrugged, ‘Just don’t tell him that.’ Darcy had laughed at that. 

Sam had been the one to suggest volunteering at the library, the quiet was good for him. ‘I have trouble with loud noises, with crowds.’ The unspoken four letter word diagnosis remained unspoken between them. 

‘Waterfalls terrify me,’ he looked surprised at that, most people did. The strange revelation had prompted him to ask about it, redirecting the conversation, which is what she had intended. 

‘Thanks for the coffee,’ they were standing outside the coffee shop and Darcy was hoping he was going to ask for her number or to see her again. She knew she could do the same, but she had the feeling he had been holding back, on edge in a way that she wondered if he had really wanted to be there. ‘I had a really good time.’

James smiled down at his hands, she glanced down and saw that his left hand was opening and closing in a fist.

‘I had a really good time too.’ He looked up at her. 

Before she could open her mouth and ask if he wanted to do it again he spoke.

‘A lot of people aren’t comfortable with this.’ Her eyes widened when he lifted his left hand and wiggled the fingers at her. ‘Not comfortable with how I got it and I know I said I was out, but it’s not something that ever really leaves you.’ He shrugged and she swallowed back the unexpected rush of sympathy. She thought about what he had said about working in the library, how the quiet and the organization helped.

Life hadn’t been particularly nice to James Barnes.

Well fuck that she had always prided herself on not being like everyone else.

‘Their loss.’ His eyes cut to hers and she didn’t look away, she lifted her chin and deliberately took his left hand in her right.

‘You sure?’ Darcy fought the urge to roll her eyes. 

‘You always this dramatic?’ James huffed out a laugh, squeezing her hand as he did, it was not an unpleasant feeling, the metal cool and unforgiving.

He smiled, ‘Sam seems to think I am.’ She grinned.

‘Good to know.’ Darcy squeezed his hand back, wondered if he could feel it.

‘Look it was just coffee, but I’m not going to lie and say that there wasn’t something there, something I would like to explore. I appreciate the heads up about the baggage.’ He flinched but didn’t correct her. ‘I’ve got some of my own.’ She had told him about the strange route her life had taken, from foster care, to university, to backpacking around Europe with her genius friend and now back at school at 27. 

James was looking at their hands, their fingers were laced together, she wondered what he was thinking. Rather than push, which was usually her way, patience was not a strong suit, she let the moment ride out.

‘I would like to explore that something too.’

He looked up at her and she grinned.

‘Good because there’s this new Thai place that I’ve been wanting to try out. You in?’

James glanced back down at their hands, she hadn’t let him go, and up at her. ‘I’m in.’

* * *

  
  


‘He is awfully pretty isn’t he?’

Jane stood next to her while James and Sam argued over the grill.

‘He sure is.’

Darcy had not been surprised that her almost boyfriend and sort of best friend had hit it off so well. James loved science and Jane  _ was _ science so when they had met and Jane had ended up confiscating all the napkins so she could draw out what she was trying and failing to explain, Darcy had smirked and taken photos.

‘You two make it official yet?’

Rather than answer Darcy took a long pull from her Corona. 

‘I guess that’s a no.’

Darcy shrugged, ‘Maybe it’s not a big deal when you’re like a certain age or whatever.’ Labels were nice and all but she knew that James cared about her and that she cared about him. They were monogamous and shared a Netflix account, what did it matter at this point if he called her his friend or girlfriend.

Cringing, she thought maybe she was in a little too much denial.

‘I have to talk to him don’t I?’

Jane just hummed, ‘Not if it doesn’t really bother you, I can’t answer that for you. If you’re ok with things like they are, then that’s ok, but if you’re not.’

‘Then I need to talk to him about it.’

Adulting sucked.

Emotions sucked.

She probably, maybe, definitely loved him, and really the thought of introducing him as her friend made her stomach curl in distaste. The last four months had not been perfect, they had had their ups and downs but he was the first person she wanted to see when she woke up and the last voice she wanted to hear before falling asleep. 

‘What if he doesn’t want that, the labels, and whatever.’

Darcy felt Jane looking over at her.

‘Then what’s the point.’

What would the point be indeed.

‘If it helps I think he’s just as in love with you as you are with him.’

Darcy almost sprayed the drink of beer she had just taken.

‘Love, what, I didn’t say that.’

Jane rolled her eyes.

‘Yeah, ok, right.’

Right, she hadn’t said that, not out loud. Not yet, but she wanted too. She really wanted too.

‘Crap.’

Jane laughed and tapped bottle against Darcy’s.

‘Good luck with that.’

His ears burning James looked over at them and he quirked an eyebrow at Darcy, he must have seen something on her face because he left Sam at the grill and headed her way.

Jane headed towards Sam exchanging a hello when she passed James.

‘Everything ok?’

Darcy picked at the bottle in her hands. There was concern in his voice and she knew he was looking at her, trying to read her face.

‘I think so. Maybe.’

In for a penny and all that.

‘Am I your girlfriend?’

The look of surprise on James’ face probably would have made her laugh but she was still nervously picking the label off her bottle.

‘Because I think we are at that level you know. Or we could be. Maybe. Unless you don’t want to be fine and that’s fine too. I mean not fine, but i’ll respect that, if you don’t want to label this, us. But if you did I wouldn't be opposed to it. At least you know if you wanted to do that. Make it more formal, well not like formal, because that’s like being engaged and I am not suggesting that, really I’m not.’

‘Darcy, Darce, hey look at me.’

She couldn’t, there were maybe, probably tears in her eyes, and she had just blurted everything out, and he was absolutely going to end things now.

‘Darcy.’

His hands cupped her cheeks and tilted her face towards his, she couldn’t stop herself from looking even if it was for like the last time or whatever. 

‘I’m an idiot Darcy, I really am.’ Her eyes went wide, the argument on the tip of her tongue, he was not an idiot and she wouldn’t stand for anyone saying it, not even him.

'I see you’re going to argue with me, but trust me I am. I’ve been yours since the beginning Darce, only yours, just didn’t know if that was what you wanted.’

Her heart melted, of course he would have been insecure in this, he was insecure about so many things. She could have made it so much easier for them both if she had just said something earlier. Never again.

‘I’ve been yours since the beginning too.’ 

‘Yeah?’

She nodded, and the tears maybe, probably fell, but she didn’t care.

‘Yeah.’

His lips pressed against hers, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close. When he pulled back, just enough to rest his forehead against hers, their noses bumping affectionately.

‘I love you James, you know that right?’

The look he gave her, she wasn’t sure she could even express everything that was there.

‘I do and I love you more, love you so much more.’

‘It’s not a competition.’ He laughed.

Looking down at her, he wiped away her tears, ‘Wanna be my girlfriend Darcy Mae?’

When he said it like that it sounded cheesy, she loved it.

‘Only if you’ll be my boyfriend James Barnes.’

‘Always.’

‘Hard same.’

* * *

  
  


Darcy rolled over, her eyes blinked open when the arm she moved to slip around James slid over an empty space. She didn’t want to think about what time it was or the class she had at 9am, she thought about where he was and if he was ok. Rolling over, she blinked away the rest of the haze of sleep and went into the attached bathroom. She loved that his bedroom came with its own bathroom.

This wasn’t the first time she had woken up and James had been absent from the bed. It made her heart ache that his dreams were unkind to him and there was nothing that she could do to help him.

She saw the outline of him through the sliding glass doors, unsurprisingly in his gym clothes,. ‘It helps sometimes to burn it out of me, the bad energy, it’s why I picked this place.’ He must have been awake longer than she realized if he had already gone down to the gym and come back.

Quietly, she slid the door open and stepped outside, the heat of the day was still in the air, heavy and muggy. Sliding her arms around his waist she pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades.

She didn’t press, didn’t ask, she had before, had made it clear that she was here for him. Some nights James shared the blood and the screams, some nights he held her close, and the really bad nights he lashed out. ‘Why are you still here, why, I'm fucked up, a broken piece of shit and you should just get out.’

Those nights she dug her heels in, crossed her arms and lifted her chin. His words hurt but not in the way that he would later apologize for. She hurt for him, for the trauma he carried every day.

Tonight she held him close while he smoked his cigarette, tears rising behind closed eyes. He only ever smoked when it was really bad, it was so unfair, and there was nothing she could do about it.

All she could do was squeeze him tight, letting him know that she was there. She felt some of the tension ease out of him, felt him lean just slightly back into her.

It wasn’t a lot, but he knew she was there, and took the comfort she was willing to offer.

* * *

  
  


‘You know I bet the two of them go into so much trouble when they were kids.’ Darcy and Sam were watching James and Steve argue over a bad call the referee had made. 

Sam snorted, ‘The way I hear it Steve was the one getting in all the trouble and James was the one bailing him out.’ Now that Darcy could totally believe.

‘Well I’m glad they have each other.’ James had finally told her how he had lost his arm, the guilt Steve had carried, and the strain it had put on their relationship. 

Sam had been the one to help them find their way back to each other, recommending that Steve see a counselor, apparently he was a level of stubborn that rivaled Darcy. 

‘It’s good to see Steve smiling again.’ Darcy had only met Steve a handful of times, but he had always been kind, with a smile that only made you want to smile in return. His last visit, he had been reeling from his breakup with Peggy and there hadn’t been many smiles.

‘It is, I’m glad he’s moving back.’ Sam handed her another beer. ‘I think it’ll be good for both of them.’

Darcy looked over, ‘And you.’ She knew how tight Sam had gotten with Steve and eventually James, even though most of their time together was spent arguing and ribbing each other.

Sam smiled, ‘And me.’

‘You know that man lights up like no ones business when you walk into a room.’ At the unexpected statement Darcy could only gape at him. 

‘I’m sorry, what.’

Sam shrugged, ‘I’m just glad he found someone, he can be,’ Sam frowned, ‘Prickly.’

Darcy swallowed back the unexpected emotion. ‘Yeah, yeah he can.’

Bumping her shoulder Sam gave her a smile, ‘So I’m happy for him, for you both, but don’t tell him that.’

That got a laugh out of her, James looked over and shot her a smile, before turning back to the TV.

‘Your secret is safe with me.’

Jane blew into the room then, carrying bags of chips and soda, Steve jumped up to help her. Sam smirked, ‘So when do you think he’s going to admit that he’s got a thing for her?’

Darcy rolled her eyes, ‘If he’s as clueless as she is, then it’ll be awhile.’ Neither were probably ready for anything, both having gotten out of pretty intense relationships but there was a chemistry there.

‘Come on little mama, there are nachos over there with our name on it.’ Sam looped an arm around her neck and walked them over to the couch. James snagged her by the waist and pulled her onto his lap.

Steve started shouting at the TV again, James pressed a kiss to her temple and started arguing with Steve again. Jane asked Sam what they were watching which earned groans from all the men. Darcy smirked, Jane knew damn good and well who was playing, she ruled the university fantasy football league.

These people, her friends, were amazing and she was grateful for everyone of them. No more than the man who held her close.

* * *

‘That the last of it?’

James stood in the doorway of her bedroom, well of her former bedroom.

‘Yup. The rest of it stays with the room.’

Darcy felt arms wrap around her waist and she leaned back into his embrace. A little over a year ago, outside of a coffee shop, she had taken a chance and taken his hand and she had yet to really let go.

‘You ready?’

There were nerves in his voice, a hesitancy to the question that had her squeezing his arm reassuringly.

‘Sure am.’

When she had mentioned that her lease was ending at the beginning of September and she was debating looking for a bigger place, James had quietly asked her if she wanted to stay with him. He had a two bedroom apartment closer to campus than she had ever hoped to afford that had a 24 hour gym and more importantly he had his own washer and dryer.

She had considered the offer for all of ten seconds and then she had said yes. Darcy wasn’t sure James had meant to make the offer and even less certain that he expected her to take him up on it, but she was not one to look central air in the mouth.

‘Are you ready?’ Darcy knew that he struggled with change, he would not admit to that, preferring to say that he avoided it when possible. Her moving in was a huge change.

And maybe there were nerves in her voice now too because he turned her around and wrapped her up in a proper hug.

‘I always hated the nights when you weren’t staying over. Can’t believe you’re going to be there every night.’

God, this man.

‘Well you’re mine and I’m keeping you,’ she pressed a kiss to the soft skin under his ear.

‘And you’re mine and I’m keeping you.’

No one had kept her before. James had introduced her to his Mom and little sisters, to Sam and finally Steve. They had all welcomed her, giving her acceptance and a place in their lives that she had only ever felt with Jane. Darcy wasn’t sure James knew how much that meant to her, for all he had lost, there had been a home waiting for him, a place to go back too with people who loved him.

Darcy had never had that, well not until today, and she was ready to go home.

‘Let’s go home.’

Right hand taking his left, she entwined their fingers together and tugged him out of the room, careful not to let him go.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Life has been kicking me in the ass hard. I needed some fluff and sweetness. This fic was inspired by the pics of Seb on the set of TWS&F show. The short hair, the dark clothes, and yeah this was the result. Please let me know what you think!


End file.
